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Captain Crunch already got his refundCongress and President Bush decided today that the best way to “stimulate” our nose-diving economy is to dish out “rebates” to pretty much all working Americans.  So the average working Joe can expect an extra 600 buckaroos for doing absolutely nothing.  Sweet, right?  I can’t wait to spend my $600 on a new iPhone, or maybe some rims for my car, or maybe I’ll just go to the casino and play with free money.  Whatever I decide to do, I’ll be doing my Patriotic duty by pumping more money into the American economy, right?

Ughh.  Let’s think about this for a minute.  The government is a corporation that’s owned by us (me and you), right?  And it’s not doing a very good job balancing it’s books.  We’re pretty close to topping the $10 trillion mark in national debt at the moment and we’re planning on adding another $250 billion to that total this year.

Now, you’re a part owner in this corporation (this isn’t a hypothetical, you are a part owner), what would you recommend we do to help bolster this failing business?  What would you do if this was a macrocosm of your personal finances?  Tighten your belt?  Cut out the name brands?  Maybe stay home and cook instead of going out?

Here’s what our government has decided to do — PARTY!!  Our economy is screwed; we’re about to go through a big market adjustment (to put it lightly) and it’s going to hurt.  So, what the hell, why not throw a party before the big storm hits? 

This stimulus package is going to cost us somewhere around $150 billion dollars.  And since YOU own this company, you know whose pocket this money is coming out of?  YOURS!

This isn’t a handout or “rebate” that the government is giving you.  It’s a forced loan.  Think about how hard you work to pay down your credit cards (or car loan or whatever).  Now imagine the government saying, “Take that credit card, and go out and spend $600 right now.”  “But I don’t want to increase my balance,” you might think.  You might get pretty pissed that the government is reaching in your pocket and spending money on your credit card.

Well, that’s what’s happening, sister.

So, when you get that check in the mail and just can’t wait to go out and spend it, remember, there’s no such thing as free money. 

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